The Good Provider

This is a re-post from my old blog.

Maureen* was raised conservatively and very traditionally. She is one of those uncommonly nice girls who did what their parents told them to do. She never attended parties, she never went on any of our picnics nor did she have a boyfriend when we were in high school. So, we went crazy when we learned she had a boyfriend some time in college. We didn't stop until we met the guy, and we did. He was smart and nice and cool. He was PERFECT for her.

As expected, they waited until they finished college and have stable jobs before they got married. It was a dream wedding, with the wedding gown and the big white cake and the long entourage. We were so happy for our friend. As responsible people as they were, in a matter of 5 years, they were able to get themselves a nice big house, a car for each of them and a cool condo unit in the city.

They are what we call in our 'book' a successful couple. We were surprised, though, that we were mistaken.. at least in a way. Yes, they are successful. They are doing very well financially and they are living very comfortably. So, I asked Maureen what's wrong. At first she was too embarrassed to tell us, so we let it go. But in her own right time, she told us what the problem was. They don't make love as often as they should.

Her husband is a workaholic. He never stops working. They don't cuddle on weekdays because they have to work. So, the only time they have for some romantic moments is the weekend, but sometimes her husband would bring home some reports to do and work until dawn, no time for love. We advised her to go out of town, that is.. out of work, so they did. But her husband got too tired of driving that he just slept in the hotel where they stayed. Bad idea.

We told her to talk about it with her husband. We said tell him what she wants. But being brought up as a nice Catholic girl she couldn't do it, she simply COULDN'T. It's as if she's going to die of embarrassment if she discusses 'this issue' with her husband. It seems to her an IMPROPER thing to discuss..

That was about 5 years ago. We hoped that the situation would change. It didn't. So, Maureen is still unnecessarily unhappy, and we are unhappy for her..

*Not real name